- Meet Bo Seo: - I'm Bo Seo. I'm a two-time
world debate champion, a former coach of the Australian National and Harvard Debate teams, and the author of "Good Arguments." - What inspired you to write your book, "Good Arguments?" - I felt the need to
write "Good Arguments" because I think our public conversations are in a state of crisis and
that is the more visible crisis that we see where every
disagreement out in media, or in the public square, is a
source of division and pain. But it's also the hidden
crisis of all the people who are driven away from participating in those conversations at all, because they fear that
it's going to be pointless, or it's going to be painful, and it's not gonna be worth their time. "Good Arguments" is not only
what democracies have to do, it's what they on their
best days aspire to be, which is a conversation between people who disagree-sometimes
over irreconcilable things- to find areas of agreement, to spot points where they need to work across their differences
to reach a better solution. One of the reasons why our
arguments are so divisive and painful at present is that, we've allowed the skills of
disagreeing well to atrophy. We no longer view argument as a skill, and as something to be worked at; rather, we see it as
something we jump into out of instinct or defensiveness. The bad arguments that result in turn, decrease our confidence in what
disagreements can do for us. And when we lack that faith
in what arguments can do, we tend to approach them more defensively. We tend to go into it with
a more defensive posture. And as a result, the lack of
faith and lack of confidence tends to be self-reinforcing. And the resulting cascade
means that the quality of the conversation further degrades. - What are some effective debate models from history? - The tradition of "Good Argument" that I'm trying to advocate for is very much rooted in history. It goes back all the way to antiquity, where in ancient Greece, the ability to make
your point persuasively, to engage other citizens
in discussion and debate, was seen as a kind of a
requirement of citizenship: that it's what it meant
for us to govern ourselves. And that developed through
tea houses, and pubs, and coffee houses in London, where, while the debates of
parliament were going on, citizens would gather
and have the same debates between themselves and to kind of play out as though they were parliamentarians, as though they were governing themselves. And that tradition kind of carries forth in the United States with a
lot of the founding fathers starting debate clubs and colleges, viewing part of their role
as leaders and as founders of a new country as
instilling in the nation that spirit of debate, right? And though that tradition
has become harder and harder to discern in our everyday lives, there have been periods in
the history of the U.S., in the history of democracies, in the history of the world, where those debates were a feature of people's day-to-day lives. So one high-profile debate
that comes to mind is, the series of debates between
the civil rights leader, James Farmer and Malcolm X, who had a different view of what racial liberation looked like, what the appropriate
response to racism was. And these were a series
of disagreements between people who were ostensibly
on the same side, whose objectives were
in some sense allied, but they were not shy about
voicing their disagreements in really candid, strong full-throated ways
in the view of the public, knowing that the other side
would respond respectfully, that they would be candid
about the disagreements, and through that conversation, that they would be able to
get somewhere they couldn't on their own. There are three lessons that I take away from the Farmer-Malcolm X debates: The first is the importance of training. Farmer came up under one
of the great debate coaches who ever lived Melvin Tolson, who was memorialized
actually by Denzel Washington in that movie, "The Great Debaters." And Malcolm X too found his
voice through a debate program in prison that allowed inmates to debate against local
colleges and local schools, and to find an outlet
for the kind of thinking that they had done through engagement with text, and with each other. So the first is, in order for us to be able to host the kinds of public debates again, that enlarges our understanding
of what's possible, we have to start training, and we have to start
training our young people. We have to train ourselves
to be able to engage in those conversations. The second is the importance of format. So, in the debates between these two men- and some of them were in colleges, some of them were on television, some of them were in radio- it's striking how long they
were given to make their points. It wasn't one to two
minutes then interruptions. Often, they would be given
quite a long stretch of time to present their arguments
with the knowledge that once they had spoken,
the other person would speak and they would get another
turn. So they could, and they were sometimes
forced to sit back and listen, knowing that their chance was
not now, it was coming later. So there's an importance
of the kind of format in which we pit two people
against one another. The third thing that you
see in those debates is, the importance of having a
relationship with the person that you're disagreeing with, that's greater than just
the disagreement itself. So behind the scenes of
these big public encounters, Farmer and Malcolm X were
getting to know one another. They were going to one another's houses. And so, by being in a relationship
with the other person, that's more than just the differences, by introducing the family to one another, by seeing the other areas of life, by doing other things together, you can often enlarge the
possibility of what you do within the debate. You can be more candid there. You can be full-throated, you can come at the other person honestly, but you know there's a relationship that you can fall back on. - What is it about competitive debate that resonates with you most? - So I started debating because
I moved, in the third grade, from South Korea to Australia without really speaking English. And I quickly found the hardest part of crossing language lines and cultural lines was adjusting to real-life conversation, where people can mid-sentence
pivot into talking about something else; where what their faces say
and what their gestures say, don't always match the words that are coming out of their mouths. And I found that all of those difficulties tended to compound in disagreements where passions tend to run, and people tend to be more
disruptive to interrupt, to speed up, and slow down
at unexpected moments. And in response to all that, I resolved to be very agreeable in the way in which I presented at school, and to keep my thoughts to myself. And the thing that changed that, and shook me out of that was, I joined the debate team off
the strength of one promise from my fifth grade
elementary school teacher, which was that in debate
when one person speaks, no one else does. And to someone who had been
used to being interrupted and spun out of conversation, that sounded to me like
a kind of salvation. One of the things that
I learned as a person really on the margins, who didn't really speak
the language, was visibly out of place on the playground
and in the classroom, was I learned to listen. I learned to read a room, I learned to take the
temperature of a place before I ever raise my voice. And I learned to do that,
not to get hurt first of all, but also because it was
the only way in which I would ever be heard. And it so happens that many of
the most successful debaters tend to come from these
slightly marginal backgrounds to have the perspective of
someone on the periphery. And I think the reason
for that is because, though it's easier to focus on the person at the front of the room
delivering a debate speech, much of the action of debate and much of the strategy
of getting ahead in debate, involves listening really intently, not only to what one's opponent is saying, but also to listen from the
perspective of an audience, so that you might be able to anticipate what they might need to hear next. And so what started for me
as a kind of a liability, or a disadvantage that I had to overcome, ended up being a tremendous strength, because the one of the
great lessons of debate is, in order to be heard,
you have to first listen. - What concerns you about how we consume information? - Debates are only as
good as the information and the knowledge and the skills
that debaters bring to it. And one of the more concerning things that we see at the moment is
people's information diets not being sufficiently varied, not being sufficiently rich to sustain the kinds of conversations
that we want to have. The first thing is, we cannot
allow the debates that we see on cable television to be
a kind of a replacement for the disagreements
that we should be having in our day-to-day lives. So our political leaders, or our favorite media personalities can't be like avatars to whom we outsource the work of thinking for ourselves and having these
conversations for ourselves. So the first is viewing media, not as a substitution, but as a source of equipment and knowledge that we can then transfer into
the kinds of conversations that we have. The second thing is, having
a variety and a diversity of sources that we turn
to to get our information. And one of the impulses
that partisan media, siloed information sources feed off, is our desire to be validated, to have news reflect back to us what we already believe to
be true about the world, and just the way that
debate encourages us to seek out differences and
to see them as productive, and revelatory, and mind-expanding. So we should view the different
signals and information and perspectives we take in, because that richer diet allows
us to see more perspectives and to challenge our own
thinking more consistently. For me, my love of debate
and desire to see things from different perspectives
to if not always agree, then at least to
understand the perspective from which others are coming from, is inextricably tied to a life that I've led of always moving countries. I had to move from
South Korea to Australia as an eight-year-old. I grew up in Australia, then
moved to the U.S. for college, I got a postgraduate degree in China, and then came back through
Australia back to the U.S. And through each of these moves, there was a lot of work of translation and work of adaptation
and having to figure out where the surroundings were at before I could make a home in them. And a lot of that was
information gathering, whether that be reading the news, but often in conversation with
people in those locations, in those neighborhoods to figure out that most basic and
difficult question, which is: Where am I? And to do that, you needed all the help
that you could get, and you needed to rely on
all the information sources you could get. And one of the things that
I learned to do, I think, is to resist easy
answers to that question- and to try and piece together
from a kind of a mosaic, all the different sides of a place. - How do you listen to opposing arguments? - We're used to thinking about listening as an essentially passive act, where we sit back in our
chairs and take it all in. Debaters know that it's a much more active process than that. So when a speaker is speaking, a debater has paper and pen ready, and they're doing at least three things: The first is they're trying
to transcribe in as accurate, or detail what the other person is saying. And often, when you separate
out your own perceptions of what this speech is
versus the reality of it, you'll find that it's sometimes different. The next thing that
you're trying to do is, try and reconstruct the
argument that's being presented in its most basic form to say: What is the real thrust of this argument? And can I put it down on
the page and organize it, on the page in a way the
other side would recognize as faithful to their argument? The next thing that you're doing is, you're sometimes building up that argument into even a stronger version. So what else could the
opposition have said to further their argument,
to improve their argument? And through this process, you are not only listening to
the words that's coming out, you're trying to reconstruct
the deeper meaning behind it. You are trying to
strengthen their argument, all for the purpose of
being able to engage with their case and their
perspective more fully. There are two lessons
that we can take away from how debaters listen, and
and to try and apply it in our own lives: The first is, it is in your best interest to understand the opposition's argument
as they would understand it. And what that means is, it's
not in your best interest to twist their meaning, or
to take it at its worst, or to capture only a fraction of it, because they won't feel as though, they had been listened to and heard and ultimately responded to. And unless that moment, that click and that moment of contact happens, it's not a real disagreement,
it's not a real debate, it's a kind of a quarrel, or people talking across one another. The second thing is, it's
also in your best interest to respond to the strongest
version of the other side, and sometimes to build
up the other side's case, so that it's even better
than where they have it now. And the reason for that is, you know after you finish speaking, the opposition might have a light bulb and come up with a better case, or someone on their side might say, "You've responded to the weak
version of this argument, but here's something better." So the further you can take it
and the stronger the version of the other side you can respond to, the further ahead you pull, the more you challenge the
other side to go even further, and the better the conversation becomes. - What is the RISA framework you use when in a disagreement with someone? - Arguments are easy to
start and hard to end because difference is the
natural state of things. There are any number of
differences between two people- and when one of those
issues comes to the fore, you can have a disagreement. But unless you are
selective about the kinds of arguments that you pick, and unless you are careful to say, "We're having this
disagreement at this moment and not all the other
disagreements we could be having," all of the differences between two people can start flooding in
and the argument becomes this unruly mass of
conflict between two people, where any of the potential
sources of conflict can come to the fore, and you're not making
progress on any given one. As a competitive debater, you become a bit enthusiastic
about disagreeing and you tend to want to take on any claim that you might disagree with, and try to provide the
best argument against it. And one of the frameworks that I developed in order to be a little
bit more judicious, to pick my fights more wisely,
is called the RISA framework. And that is before launching
into a disagreement, or challenging a claim to ask four things: First, whether the
disagreement is in fact real as opposed to an imagined
slight or a misunderstanding. The second is to ask whether
it's important enough to you to justify the disagreement. The third is to ask whether the question, or the topic of disagreement
is specific enough in order for you to make some progress. And the fourth is to ask, whether you and the other person
engaged in the disagreement are aligned in your objectives
for wanting to partake in that conversation. And by checking off on these four lists, you can't guarantee that a
conversation is going to go well, but you may be able to give
it the best possible chance of doing so. One of the limitations
of the RISA framework that I worry about is that
it is increasingly difficult to find the right kind of alignment in people's interests
for wanting to engage in a disagreement. So if you have two sides that simply want to hurt
one another's feelings by having an argument, that's
some kind of alignment, but not the right kind that leads to productive conversations. And the place where the
RISA framework can go wrong is in a world where
everybody wants to engage in disagreements for bad reasons. And to combat that, I think we need to restore
confidence and faith in what disagreements can be, and to highlight its
potential as a source for good as well as a source for ill. So one place where you might be able to apply the RISA framework is an event that is a source of dread
for a lot of people, which is getting together
with extended family for Thanksgiving, or Christmas, or Easter. And knowing that some of the personal, or political disagreements
are gonna bubble up to the surface. The RISA framework provides
two sources of help in that situation. The first is, that every
disagreement should start with a little bit of agreement, and that is often naming
exactly what it is that you disagree about, so that it doesn't bubble
up into an unruly conflict about all the different slights, and disagreements and
all the different areas in which you don't see eye to eye. So the first act is to, and the first step is
to name the disagreement in front of you, and you need to do that before you can even start
to apply the RISA framework. The second thing is, it may
be that two people don't start with the same objectives in mind when they enter the conversation, but one of the things that
you might be able to do is to check: 'Well why
do you want to engage in this disagreement? And can we come to an
agreement about what it is that we're hoping to get
out of this conversation?' So forcing the slightly
quarrelsome family member who just wants to be a contrarian, or to cause trouble to say, "Are you really in this
hoping to persuade me to change my mind, or are you really in this
to hear my perspective, or a different take on these
positions that you hold?" That bit of negotiation of why it is that we're in the conversation
in the first instance, and that level of
alignment can often allow our conversations to go better, than if we just jump
into the disagreements without much forethought. - How do you choose which details in an argument to respond to? - If intelligence is the ability
to respond to any argument, wisdom lies in knowing which
arguments to respond to, and which parts of an
argument to respond to. And debaters usually ask two questions: The first is, is a given point within the
opposition's argument or case, is it necessary to
challenge in order for us to resolve the overall dispute? And if it's not, is us challenging it
or disagreeing with it, going to help us make progress
on the overall dispute? So by asking whether a point
that the other side is making, no matter how offensive or
wrong seeming it may be, by asking whether it's first
necessary to challenge, or even if it's not whether challenging it would help us make
progress on the argument, you can be a little bit more judicious in how you disagree and
prevent our arguments from becoming this unruly,
all-encompassing dispute. The importance of beginning a dispute with the RISA framework is that, it allows us to almost make a
contract with the other side, to say, "This is what
we're disagreeing about and these are the reasons why we're engaging in that dispute." And one of the things that you can do with someone who tries
to break those rules, to expand the debate into
something it wasn't about, to change the topic to
introduce new reasons for wanting to engage in the dispute, is just to remind ourselves
of the agreement that we made, of the kind of disagreement
that we want to have, and what we want to disagree about- and to bring the conversation
back to those parameters. - What are side-switching exercises? - So much of debate is
an exercise in certainty. It's about spending sometimes weeks researching your side of the case, coming up with the best
possible arguments that you can, coming up with the best lines that you can to sell the truth of your
side to the listener. But in the last moments before
a debater goes on stage, they know to take a breath, to take out a new sheet of paper, and to put themselves in
their opponent's shoes and write the four best
arguments of the opposing side. They know also to look
over their case again, this time through the eyes of someone who fervently disagrees with them, and to identify all of the
flaws, and the mistakes, and the criticisms that could
be leveled against them. Debaters also know to imagine, to imagine a world in
which they lost the debate and to come up with the
reasons why they did. And those exercises, which are called the
'side-switch exercises,' puts a pause on that feeling of certainty. It makes us feel for a moment
the subject of reasonableness of other people's beliefs. It gives us that moment
where we get back on our toes and think maybe we missed something. It makes us imagine a
world in which we're wrong, or at least we're judged to be wrong. And all of that isn't humility, isn't empathy in and of itself, but it creates a wiggle room through which something like humility, or empathy might arise. I find empathy hard to
practice in my day-to-day life, because I often feel as though
I don't know what it is. Sometimes it feels like a kind of a magical psychic connection that you look into the eyes of someone and then somewhere music starts
playing in the background, or it feels like a virtue
that some people are born with and that other people don't possess. It was through the experience of debating that I saw a different view of empathy, which is empathy as a series of actions, which by putting yourselves
in the shoes of an opponent and coming up with some
arguments for their case, or by looking at yourself
through the eyes of an opposition and trying to look at all the reasons why you might be wrong. I think so many of our
conversations at the moment feel like they're stuck. It's people fully convinced of their views shouting at each other from a distance. And it's a kind of a trenched warfare, where people are fully
entrenched in the position that they've always held, and creating that little
wiggle room for doubt, for letting in the possibility
that the other side might have a couple of points in their favor and that you might have missed something- I think that's one way
in which empathy comes in at a time when it's in such short supply. The science which exercises,
and the kind of empathy that debate brings into the conversation, is not only applicable in
personal disagreements, but in my view, more
urgently needed than ever in our political disputes, in disputes between political parties and factions and your ideological commitments. But in order for us to be
able to put into practice, I think we have to remember that, each of us are bigger than
our political affiliations, than our religious commitments, than our ideological beliefs. And more importantly, the other person is more
than a representative of their party or their
position in society, or the beliefs that they hold. And by allowing our
encounters to be larger than the affiliations that we have, that gives us the best chance I think, of being able to explore new ideas, to listen to the particular nuances of where the other person is coming from and not the categories
we would place them in. And it's in that setting that
exercises like side-switch become most effective. When we view the other person, and when we view
ourselves in our fullness, and not merely by our
membership or affiliation in groups of like-minded folks. - What subjects should we not debate? - One of the hardest questions
I had to grapple with in writing this book is: Are there some subjects that
we simply should not debate? And the conclusion I came to is: We should draw at least one bright line, which is saying, "We should not debate the equal moral standing of persons." And the reason for that is,
the whole premise of debate. And the reason why we
give people equal time in which to speak and
we give them the promise of being able to speak uninterrupted, is because we say their
voice is worth hearing, and their voice is worth hearing equally as that of their opponent. And so a debate about whether
a certain race of people, or group of people are
inferior would not be, would be antithetical to
what debate stands for. The recent attempts to shut down debates about certain topics or
to de-platform speakers who have been spreading
divisive and hurtful messages, seems to me, both a
response to the fact that many of us have lost the ability
to disagree constructively, and passionately, and humanely. But it also seems a reflection
of a lack of confidence that the resulting disagreements
can be anything other than a source of pain and of division. And so one of the things
that I think the skills of debate does, that
the RISA framework does, that side-switching does is, it expands the scope of what
we are able to talk about because it enlarges and improves
and strengthens our ability to talk about contentious
and difficult issues, in humane, compassionate,
and productive ways. So, one of the reasons why we
need the skills of debate now is at a time when there
are all these pressures to shut down debate, to be able to not only
talk about more things, but to do it in a way
that brings in people rather than excludes them. - How should we approach a social media debate? - There's a lot of literature now about, how you might be able to pull
ahead in social media fights. There's wisdom about not engaging
in the discussion forever, not using too many inflammatory
words, so on and so on. But I tend to be a little bit
more pessimistic about it. And I think in order for
us to start building back the skills of good argument, we usually need to do it face to face. And we might need to do it
in the absence of an audience to start with so that we resist the urge to perform for an audience, but rather listen and respond
to the person across from us. So it may well be that a
better version of social media that doesn't amplify the
most inflammatory material, that doesn't have anonymous contributors, that doesn't have the kind
of the culture of hate and vile disagreements
that we see at present. It may be that we can
one day equip ourselves to engage in a better
form of social media, but I tend to think the starting place has to be face to face, has to be maybe away from
an audience to begin with, so that we're building
one interaction at a time, the skills that we have lost. - What is the psychology behind liking or disliking to argue? - The people in my life
who are most quarrelsome, who are most primed to always
engage in disagreements, tend to want I think two
irreconcilable things: The first is often they want to be heard, and they want to have their
perspective carry through and to connect with the listener. But another slightly darker
desire they have is to dominate over their opponents and to
show themselves superior. And the two are in conflict because the point of one is to make a
connection with the other side and to have your message carry through, whereas the other is to almost
leapfrog over the listener and to show yourself
to be better than them. And so I think those
people are often caught, and one of the reasons
why the people who are most quarrelsome who put
themselves out as best at debate need to continue engaging with it, it's because they don't quite
find what they're looking for- and I think what they're
looking for is connection. I've had to think a lot about
conflict aversion because I myself am a pretty
conflict-averse person. I used to be one, and I still
feel the instinct of that despite all my years in debate. And this is something I've
changed my mind about. I used to think that
conflict aversion was, a lack of confidence
in one's own abilities. A kind of a defensiveness to
shield one's self from hurt, to protect oneself from
revealing too much, or becoming too vulnerable
to the other side. And I think that is one element, but nowadays I think conflict aversion also shows a lack of
confidence in the other person, in their ability to receive
you with some measure of grace to respond to you kindly and
to make something constructive out of the conversation
you are building together. And so I think the common trait of conflict diverse folks
is a lack of confidence, not only in one's own abilities, but I think more controlling, more importantly in the other person. Where the conflict-averse person and the highly combative person meet, in my view, is in their shared
desire for a connection. And it's a connection that they don't get just by persisting in
their most natural modes. You can't connect if the only
grounds on which you connect with another person or you
reach out to another person is similarity rather than difference. And similarly, you can't connect
if your whole desire is to dominate or to show
yourself to be superior than the other person. So, in managing both of those
personalities as a debater and as a coach-but also as, in my view, every human contains both of
these instincts within them- I think the place where they
meet and the middle ground where good argument stem from, is from a recognition that it's through connection with others, it's through an encounter with others that we get more than we
would be able to on our own. - Why are disagreements with loved ones the most painful? - Some of the most painful disagreements we come across in our day-to-day
lives are with loved ones. And I think the reason for that
in one word is carelessness. When it comes to those
whom we're closest to, we are usually quickest to
assume they should agree with us. After all, they're the people we've chosen to share our lives with. We're quickest to assume
they should understand us even when we're not expressing
ourselves very clearly. After all, they're the
people who know us best. And the combination of
all of those things is, we're least likely to think about the effort that it takes to disagree well, because we have this idea that
love should be effortless. And the great tragedy of that is, if only we love the other
person a little bit less, or if we care for them a little bit less, then maybe our disagreements
would be less painful. The more we care about another person, the more high stakes a disagreement feels. The closer we feel to another person, the more we think they must agree with us, and the more of our lives we
share with another person, the more points of potential
disagreements arise. - Why is agreeing better than disagreeing? - So in this time of extreme polarization, the impulse to seek out agreement can feel pretty attractive. And this is the rhetoric of, remember there is no Red
America, no Blue America, right? This is the unifying rhetoric of focusing on all of the different
things that we have in common rather than the things
that bring us apart- and someone might plead at this point, we're all human after all
and we should focus on that. And the force of that argument
that unifying rhetoric, derives not only from what
we can do when we focus on the agreement between us, but I think also from
the shadow that lurks, which is disagreements
can be really destructive. And so part of the appeal
of that unifying logic comes from conjuring up the boogeyman of what disagreement can be. And at least it's not that, at least we can have agreement
that's a little bit thinner, maybe a little bit blander, just having to do with
us being generally human, or living in the same place. But it's better than the
alternative of divisive and painful disagreements. - What makes rhetoric so powerful? - I think we're living at a time of real distrust of rhetoric. And when we say something is rhetoric, we mean something like,
"it's mere rhetoric." Those are just empty words
or you're trying to fool me in some way; you're
trying to manipulate me. And the origins of that
suspicion of rhetoric come right from the beginning of rhetoric as a kind of an education and a tradition. So there's a debate between
Socrates and Gorgias, who's a rhetorician and a public speaker, and Socrates, accuses Gorgias essentially of
practicing an art of rhetoric which is divorced from the truth, that preys on people's
desire to be flattered, that preys on their kind of fickleness, and their responsiveness
to emotional appeal rather than the dictates of reason. And this view and this
suspicion of rhetoric has really won out these days. When people say, "That's just rhetoric," it's a kind of an
accusation, it's a putdown, it's a way to reveal a kind of a trick. And in the book I take the opposite view, that it's precisely
because of our frailties, our capacity to be lazy, our
capacity to be apathetic, that we need things that
tug at our heartstrings and forces us to take some action. That because it takes an enormous amount of activation energy to
change our minds at all, let alone to act on those changed beliefs, we need something greater than
ourselves to pull us along. Now that comes with a recognition
that we're playing with mercurial elements, right? With emotion, with passion,
with fellow feeling, with identifying with the speaker. But as with so many things in debate, a conversation that doesn't have these elements that make us human, is also a conversation diminished. It's a conversation that is not lifelike and that lacks some of the
vastness, some of the richness that a real human
conversation can provide- and to do that I think you need rhetoric. Whenever we teach a population, a great and powerful new
skill that can be used for good or for evil, we need to give them the tool
to manage that new power. And that's true of whether
it's nuclear physics, or whether it's a martial art, or whether it's working
in weapons development. You need to give people
both the ability to harness the power for good and to prevent it from being used for bad. And I think this is true for debate too: that in a world where many
people possess the tools of rhetoric, some of them
will use it for evil, will use it to promote bad ends, and a population that understands
both faces of rhetoric, the ways in which it can be used for good, but the ways in which it
can be hijacked and abused, I think that's a population
that has more immunity to demagoguery, to the abuses of rhetoric, because they're able to
identify what is happening, to be able to call it
out in some instances, and resist the temptation to simply go along with it uncritically. - What are the three
principles of rhetoric? - There are three principles
from debate on using rhetoric more effectively in our disagreements: The first is proportionality,
the second is personality, and the third is panache-
it's the three P's. The first is, many of
the abuses of rhetoric come when the kinds of
claims that we're making, or the words we're using,
or the gestures we're making are out of sync with the
content of the arguments; they exaggerate or they diminish, or they're out of proportion. So the first is not to overstate things, but not to understate things either, both in terms of the language that we use and in the gestures that we use. So there has to be a
kind of a proportionality between the rhetoric we marshal
in favor of our arguments and the arguments themselves. The second is personality, which is bringing ourselves
into our arguments a little bit more. Remember what we're trying
to do is to make the audience undergo a kind of a change
to end up somewhere, believing something they didn't before. And in order to do that, they have to make a kind of a
journey from where they were to where they're going. And one way in which we might be able to help them undergo that journey, is by explaining how we went
through that process ourselves. So people may not always
know very much about, a particular issue or the
truth of any given claim, but people are pretty good
at judging other people. And by showing your own journey and how you got to the
position and the perspective that you you're offering, that can often be very useful. The last bit is panache, which is there is a part of rhetoric which is crafting the language, putting the right combination
of words in sequence, using all the tools of voice and gesture to be able to most effectively
sell that argument. Those moments of panache, or what we call in debate sometimes, are "applause lines"
are important because, they signal to the listener
that they are worthy of a certain kind of attention and work that we, with them in
mind, put in all this time to try and make this sound as convincing as we possibly could. - What is Schopenhauer's Eristic Dialectic and why is it useful? - So Arthur Schopenhauer
was a German philosopher born in the late 1700s. And in addition to all of the
broad ranging contributions that he made to philosophy
from aesthetics to ethics, he personally took a
pretty dim view of humanity and of our situation.
He said as a teenager, having experienced a lot
of loss in his family, that the world must be the work of a devil who created the world so
that they could relish in the suffering that people went through. And in his work as a philosopher, he was known as a very
confrontational quarrelsome character who picked fights with everyone, and tried to get one up them in a debate, and in a disagreement. And later in his life he
wrote this parody document called "The Eristic Dialectic," where he offers 30 odd tactics
for beating the other side at all costs. And they're tactics like interrupt, and call the other person names, or change the subject,
or offer a non sequitur to confuse the other side. And the question for me and the
question with any parody is: Does he believe that this is all there is? That this is all people
are really capable of? Or is it a kind of a
political document inspired to help us do better, to see
our situation for what it is: the comic, slightly tragic mess that our disagreements can be, and to aspire to do something better? So the rules of debate
simple as they are matter, because it's what makes
a conversation a debate rather than simply conflict
or an exchange of insults. When we explode the rules of debate, we change what is valued and
rewarded in a conversation. So in a free-for-all of the kind that Schopenhauer prepares us for,
the things that are rewarded are leaving the other side speechless, or putting forward a
dominant performance that gets the other side to trip up, or gets the audience to
jeer and boo the opposition, so that we're not able
to hear them at all. So the rules of debate
are important because in order for us to reward
reasoning, thinking, responding, listening, all of the things that we value and should
value in conversation, we need to first set up a
structure that rewards that. The one glimmer that we
see in this parody document by Schopenhauer is this
notion that by understanding the tactics that bullies use,
by being able to counter them, by being able to defend
ourselves against them and in some ways turn some of
those tactics against them, we may be able to deter them
from using those tactics in the first instance. So even in this quite dark view of what disagreements can do, there's a sense that by learning a kind of 'a defense against the dark arts,' we may be able to nudge our conversations in a better direction. - Why are we susceptible
to 'dark art' debaters? - One of the reasons
why debate is vulnerable to the manipulations of
bad faith actors is that it rewards both persuasiveness, but also the perception of persuasiveness. So as an adjudicator or even
as a member of the audience, you often don't know that much
about the particular issues that are being debated. You may not even know about the people who are presenting the argument. Instead, what you have is
all of the body language, all of the ticks in their speech, all of the signals that you get of who's ahead and who's behind. And bullies tend to
exploit that by appearing as the more dominant side, the more unshakeable side; that even when they're
behind in an argument by never looking flustered, or never looking as though
they're falling behind. And so the bullies tend, in my experience, to be especially attuned
to the element of debate that is spectacle in addition to reason. I think the reason why we're susceptible to those kinds of manipulations
is because we're imperfect. We like to be flattered, we like to be told things
we already believe, we like to feel like
we're on the winning side. We like to feel like
we have the protection of someone who's stronger. And some of these kinds
of basal instincts, some of these kinds of
insecurities that we all possess are exactly what bad faith arguers try to target and exploit. - What were your thoughts on the 2016 presidential debates? - I was watching the first
presidential election debates with my debate partner and we'd been, we'd received an assignment
from the Atlantic Media to write a kind of a review of the two candidates'
performance in the debates, and maybe to come to a judgment of which of the two sides had won. And we were busy taking notes throughout, writing all of the
different tactical slipups, and moves that the two sides were using. But ultimately we ended up never
filing that article because we didn't feel like it
had been a debate at all. And so, whoever came out
ahead in the audience polls about who they believed had
won, in as much as it was a win, it wasn't a debate victory, because what had unfolded wasn't a debate, it was a kind of a brawl. What was then my greatest
triumph in the world of debate- which was winning the World University's
Debate Championships- and what started as the
absolute highlight of my years and the height of my confidence
in what debate could do for a person and could do for a society, I saw that sink to a kind of a bottom when you saw the two people competing for, perhaps the most consequential
office in the entire world, engaged in a kind of
an unedifying spectacle that was a debate in name only. And I saw the potential
for the format of debate to which I'd given much of
my still short life too. I saw the potential for
that format to be exploited, to be hijacked, and to be degraded. The thing that struck me
most about those debates, is how quickly a stage set up
with rules, with moderators, with the values of a community that had decided to make debates a part of the democratic process, how quickly that could be turned into a kind of a brawl where
there were no rules, where the only thing that
mattered was the display and the spectacle of
dominance over the other side, where embarrassment was the currency, or where picking oneself up
always came at the expense of putting the other side down. And for me the takeaway from that was, those darker impulses that feed
into bad disagreements are, not only within the activity of debate, but they're within all of us. That just the way that
we have the capacity to disagree well, we also have the capacity
to disagree badly. And both those sides
and both those impulses have to be managed, so that we can nudge our arguments in the direction of the good. - What are the four 'debate bullies'? - Having seen how the debate
format can be broken down, can be hijacked by bad faith debaters, I resolve to diagnose and
list the common tactics that are used by bad faith arguers, so that we might have a
hope of recognizing it when we see it in practice and responding. And I came to four common
kinds of bad arguers that we see in our day-to-day lives, not only in our political lives but also around the kitchen
table, in our workplaces. And the four common
personas I came up with, were first 'the dodger,'
second, 'the twister,' third, 'the wrangler,'
and fourth, 'the liar.' So the dodger wins by
essentially changing the topic, and they usually do this
by finding a pivot point. So you might say something like, we need to reduce our
reliance on fossil fuels because climate change
is getting out of hand. Then they might say, "On
the topic of climate change, why do you drive a
four-wheel drive, right?" Or, "Why do you have a gas
guzzler in your garage?" And it is a kind of a
response on the same topic, but not to the point that you had raised. And so, the way in which
the dodger gets ahead is when you take the bait
and you start talking about your car and making defenses for yourself. And so the response to the
dodger is to stay the course and to keep bringing the discussion back to the original point
and highlighting that they are trying to change what
the disagreement is about. The second kind of persona is the twister, and the twister's signature
move is to misrepresent the point that you are making. So if you say, "I'm opposed
to increasing taxes," the twister might say, "Does that mean you have no
concern for social security?" Or, "Are you so selfish that, you think there should be no
limits on personal property?" And so this is a kind of a
'straw man argument' because it's not the argument you are raising, it's the one they're
thrusting on you, right? And so, to respond to the twister, it's imperative to correct the record and say, "No, that's not what I'm saying," because once you get this
kind of misrepresentation, you can often get into
a position of arguing for something you don't believe, or at least the conversation splitting, and you not being able to connect and talk about the same issue. It can often be difficult
to respond to a personality like the twister because you get a sense that something is going wrong here, or clearly they're
pulling something on you but you're not sure what it is. And so one of the reasons
why we need to be able to recognize things like straw man, and just have the
vocabulary to be able to say that's what they're doing, is so that we're able to pause and
diagnose what has gone wrong in the disagreement. The third kind of bad arguer
is called the wrangler. And this is the person for whom
nothing is ever good enough. They're very good at
coming up with critiques against just about everything
that you're saying, but they never offer an
alternative of their own. And this is a problem
because your solution, or the thing you're arguing
for probably isn't perfect, but so long as it's better
than the alternative, which might be just doing
whatever we're doing now, it still probably is
the preferable solution. And so the appropriate response
to the wrangler is to say, "Well, what do you believe?" In other words, to pin them to a position, so that they too have to
argue in favor of something rather than always saying no. The fourth personality and someone we see just about everywhere in our
public and private discussions these days is the liar. And one of the things we
know about the liar is, they usually don't tell
one lie, they tell many. So that it becomes
overwhelming and their opponent either doesn't know how to respond to this effluence of stuff
coming out from the other side, or they waste all their
time trying to respond. So the strategy against the liar, is to choose one or
two representative lies that you think best
exemplifies the approach that the liar is taking in a disagreement. Then debaters do something
called "plug and replace." The first is to imagine as though the opposition's claim is true, and then to explain all
the problems that arise when you make that assumption. So let's imagine if what
you're saying is that, immigrants cause lots of trouble when they come into a country, then how do you explain the fact that, crime rates among that
community is actually lower than the rest of the population? Then you replace the lie
with a truth and say, "It's in fact not true that
they are kind of bad actors who cause all these
problems and that explains what we know to be true about the world." And so, by plugging in the
lie and then replacing it with the truth, you can demonstrate the ways
in which the lie falls short and try and explain how that's symptomatic of a broader approach that the
liar is taking to the debate. It's entirely impractical
to try to respond to every single lie. And so it becomes important to choose one or two of the lies that
are most representative. And that shows something
about how the other side is approaching the disagreement. And by even naming that
this is what they're doing, they're trying to overwhelm
us with the volume of lies, you start to take away
some of the illusion, or some of the trick by
revealing how it works. - How do you defeat a debate bully? - So now let's imagine you are up against one of these players who's
dominant and blustering and super confident in their
abilities: How do you respond? I think the first thing
is to stay the course. And so often people tend
to shrink themselves, or to change their own behavior
in response to the bullies. They often try to imitate
them and play their game, which they usually can't because most of us are not built to be bullies and these kinds of blustering showmen. Or they try to speed up for example, and shrink their
contributions into the spaces that the bullies allot us when
they're not interrupting us. So the key is to remain calm
and not to change our behavior in response to how they're
trying to get us to change. The second is to actually pause and say, "Is it a debate that we're trying to have, or is it something else?" Because one of the ways in
which bullies get ahead is by changing the nature of the
conversation that we're having. And as soon as you start
playing the same game, trash talking and calling
them names and so on, that becomes the exercise
that you're now engaged in. So it's a, the second move is to stop and remind people that it's a debate that we're trying to have
and not something else. And the last thing is, if
you're unable to do that, you should also be able to
defer the conversation and say, "We're not getting anywhere at the moment, and we're gonna stop until
we are able to get to a point of agreement again about
the kind of conversation that we want to have." And so even at a time when
we might feel hopeless, faced with a bully or a bad-faith debater, we need to have tools so
that we're able to respond. But we also have these three
strategies available to us to reset the kind of
conversation we want to have. The fifth persona of bad
faith disagreement differs from the other four because he or she is not interested in trying
to pull a sneaky maneuver within the logic of debate. Rather it's their aim to
change the conversation from a debate into something else, into a kind of a brawl or
an all-out disagreement where anything goes. And so brawlers get ahead by
changing the rules of the game, so fundamentally that all of those things that we value in debate
now go out the window, and you are essentially
in a kind of a fistfight fought over words. The first thing to remember is: though many of us contain
the impulses to brawl, to turn a debate into
something other than a debate, very few people, I think,
are actually beyond the pale. And so pausing a conversation, reminding them it's a debate
that we're trying to have and not a different kind of conversation, I think can often be effective at checking and reminding the other side, "I know what you're trying to do, and I'm trying to resist it. I'm trying to bring this
conversation back on course." So in most instances against most people, even when they are inhabiting
this bullying persona, I think the right thing is to
try and bring the conversation back into the mold of a debate. But there are instances where on that day, or just because of the
kind of person they are, they're not amenable to engaging
in the kind of conversation you want to. And when you have someone like that, it may well be that
persuasion can no longer be the aim of the exchange. It can be something like
checking their lies, or offering a different perspective. But so, when you're
faced with someone who is a brawler to their core,
a bully to their core, then you have to shift your orientation away probably from simply persuading them, but to maybe checking their lies, or to offering a different perspective. One thing that knowledge
and mastery of this kind of defense against the dark
arts allows us to do, is to challenge the bullies in our lives. And some of that is a
necessity because they're there and they often bring the fight to us. But it's also an important
thing to engage bad faith actors as early as we can, and in many instances, as often as we can, because the power of bullies
increases without challenge, and the ability of their
lies to set in and to spread all of that is increased where there is no competing perspective. So one of the things that
this toolkit allows us to do, is it allows us to challenge
views that would otherwise go undetected, or underappreciated,
or unchallenged. So one place where we
saw these three moves of staying the course of
pausing and reminding people it's a debate, and of deferring the round until the circumstances
are more hospitable to having a debate, took place during the
height of the Cold War, where the then-U.S. Vice
President Richard Nixon, debated the Soviet
Premier Nikita Khrushchev at a model U.S. home in Moscow. And here you had on one side,
a relatively svelte kind of, a very savvy political operator in Nixon. And on the other side, a much larger kind of imposing physical
presence who embodied in some way the Soviet alternative to the U.S. vision of liberal democracy. And in the debate that ensued, Nixon had been a kind of a
champion high school debater who had been taught
that it's a conversation that we're trying to have in debate, that you shouldn't
shout at your opponents, said you shouldn't talk over them. He came across in Krushchev, a person who was used to hearing the sound of his own voice, right? And not being spoken over and
dominating every conversation he took part in. And in response, Nixon seemed to pull out some of the strategies that
he had learned as a debater. He refused to change his argument strategy in response to Khrushchev's
attempt to interrupt, he stayed the course, he slowed down, he paused while the other
person was speaking, but picked up right where he had left off. He called out all the
constant interruptions. He said, "In the U.S. we
would call you a filibuster because you do all the talking." And that kind of moment of levity reset and took some of the heat
out of what would otherwise have been people talking over one another. And when none of that
was working, Nixon said, "Let's do this again another time," right? And forced an agreement
from Khrushchev that, they would pick up the
discussion at a future point. And we know Nixon actually
as someone who had his hopes in electoral politics harmed in part by the televised debates with JFK- and the big story there
was that he was the loser. But in this earlier
confrontation where he stood for, as the voice of an entire country, really against its main adversary, it seemed that the skills
of debate stood him in much better position there. So as a debater, you
don't win every round, you don't lose every round, but the skills can come in quite useful. - Why are our differences important? - So Thomas Hobbes, the
English philosopher, took a pretty pessimistic view,
not only of disagreements, but the kinds of people we become when we engage in disagreements:
which is we become petty, we become defensive, we focus
on people's personality. And he believed that these petty disputes can grow into a kind of a conflagration that brings down not only
relationships, but also nations. And this was a man who lived
through periods of war, and so he saw the destructive
force that arguments can be. And looking at all that damage- which I think is not
dissimilar to where we are, and the kind of things that we see in the destructive
capacity of disagreements- he concluded that the appropriate response was to take on a posture of civil silence towards one another. That we wouldn't engage
in these disagreements, that we would, as much as
possible, try to grin and bear to tolerate one another's differences and not to disagree about them overtly, lest the disagreements grow
into a state of conflict that none of us can control. I mean, Hobbes is a pretty smart guy, and so it's hard to
dismiss some of these ideas too flippantly. And the honest truth is, I felt the force of that
wisdom in my day-to-day life. You know, when I was feeling like, I didn't have a voice, or when I was feeling like, I was on the margins and my being, my welcomeness in a place
was kind of conditional on me not causing too much
trouble or rocking the boat. When I've been through periods in my life where I've felt that kind of
defensiveness or vulnerability, I often did have the thought,
'It would go a lot easier if we could focus on our similarities and to minimize as much as
possible, the differences.' And the problem with
that is our commonalities are only one part of the
fullness of our relationship with one another. And part of what makes the encounter between two people meaningful, is not only all the
things that they share, but the differences, and that variety is a source of challenge. It's the way in which
we piece together truth from different perspectives. It's the way in which
we go beyond ourselves, learn something new,
reach for something new. And so, a life built just around agreement is an impoverished life
because it requires taking away and ignoring so much of the
richness of human relationships and the encounters they give rise to. I see debate as one answer to
a broader question, which is: How do we disagree better? And though debate is an
important answer to the question, it's not the only way in
which we can disagree. And in the same way I see the question of, how we disagree better, as
one answer to the question, what do we do about the fact
that each of us are different, but that we must find
ways of getting along? Disagreeing about our
differences is not the only way in which we coexist and
learn to navigate around our differences. We can also
negotiate, we can collaborate, we can tolerate, we can
let some things pass, but we can also disagree. In the same way, we can
disagree by debating, but we can also do it through organizing our side against your side. We can do it by lobbying one another. We can do it by negotiating. And so debate is one set of tools that we can bring to disagreement- just the way disagreement
is one approach we can bring to the broader project of living together. - To learn even more from the world's biggest thinkers, get Big Think+ for your business.
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